Have a peaceful journey

One unique experience living in a landed property in Singapore is when a death occurs in your neighbour's house. It may be a normal mundane morning when suddenly lorry loads of fold-able tables and white plastic chairs arrive or you may come home after work to find white tentages erected in your neighbour's house. Such was the case when I returned home one afternoon to find preparations for a funeral wake taking place directly next door. The couple with their 2 children are just a few years younger than me and there aren't any old folks living with them. Gingerly my husband and me called on them to find out what happened before the coffin arrived. You may say it was a bit of a relief for us when my neighbour and his wife greeted us at the door.

Apparently my neighbour has a brother who lived in US with his family. He had died suddenly and being a Singaporean wanted to be cremated and have his final resting place back home. Hence the funeral wake was held in my neighbour's house. We made another trip to pay our respect and I noticed the coffin was placed in the living room.

Now it is usual for me to take my afternoon nap on the sofa in my living room. That afternoon after the visit, as I lay down on the sofa I thought of the coffin next door, just separated by a common wall. At first I thought it spooky but then I began to contemplate accepting death and not to fear it as encouraged in Buddhist teachings.

As I write this blog I am looking out of my dining room where a funeral is taking place next door. A bereavement van is parked outside my house. A priest in white  robes walks past and I hear the singing of hymns. The van is then driven into the house. A bus stops in front of my house and people get onto the bus apparently to attend the church for the final service. Now all is quiet and all the vehicles have left.

I remember many years ago when my brother in law passed away I was in the bus heading for the crematorium. As the bus was travelling up a flyover I looked down at the vehicles criss crossing the lanes below. I thought to myself then, one person has left us and "the world goes on" as if nothing has happened. In most other funerals that I attend I have this same feeling, a sense of confusion, of not being able to grasp the reality of death whilst the world goes on as if none the worse. But such is life. Death touches the heart of the loved ones but with time they will heal and life goes on. Death dwells  side by side with living. Just like this morning I could hear my neighbour playing with the granddaughter of his deceased brother at the backyard. "Look at the bird" he said pointing to the chirping bird on the fence as the little toddler squealed with delight and their dog barked and my cat napped separated by a low barricade. All these when a dead body laid in their house.

May you have a peaceful journey and May the hearts of your family heal soon and carry on their lives with bearable pain and beautiful memories.