No Me

Exploring the idea of "not being here" or "no me", visualising how people carry on their lives by hook or by crook without you around, how the world goes on, the routines, the highs and the lows without your input, can generate a strange sense of freedom. You picture yourself standing at the fringe watching things go by. In a weird sense you feel kind of happy that actually you are now still alive, and like a peripheral device will plug yourself in to provide support to people when needed. Likewise there is no sadness when no one calls upon you or remembers you. You are content because that continuous need to forge an identity of responsibility has been lifted. It is also liberating when you don't have to uphold any image and can stop letting people tell you who you should be. It allows you to follow your heart's true bidding without the traps of pretensions. Fetters of cravings and attachment that once preoccupy you fall away.

I won't be surprised my readers think I am going bongkus or wonder what garbage I am throwing out. However there is no harm in stretching your mind into the wilderness once in awhile and take note of your thoughts and feelings that arise from this idea, whether it is abhorrence or curiosity. Who knows you may discover things about yourself you have never known. It may be difficult for a youthful person to entertain such thoughts for it is said you need to establish an identity before letting go of it. Western psychology emphasize the need for self esteem to have a stable personality and personal well being. Unfortunately, very often a man's sense of self esteem is dependent on the opinion of others. In his relentless pursuit to achieve the yardsticks of success prescribed by his community a man may lose his true self.

Just like a coin with 2 sides, whilst the head is the front that bears a statesman's head it is the tail side which tells its intrinsic value. It may therefore make sense to turn the head away occasionally to see our true essence.