Boundaries and Equanimity

An ex colleague shared that his boss was born in the year of the Horse (Chinese Zodiac). He then assumed that 2014 being the year of the Horse would naturally be a good year for the boss. I informed him otherwise as I have read the 2014 horoscope forecast for "Horse" people, myself being one of them. My colleague sighed and remarked that if the year is bad for the boss it would naturally be a bad year for all his subordinates as well.

In the Chinese Horoscope each year there will be certain zodiac animals that will be in direct and indirect conflict with the Grand Duke of Jupiter ( fanTai Sui) . For 2014 the Rat is in direct conflict with the Duke whilst the Horse, Ox and Rabbit are in indirect conflict of some sort. People born under these zodiac signs will have challenges and obstacles in varying degrees. Given that there are only 12 zodiac animals and 4 are in trouble, it would mean that about a third of the population will  have a bumpy ride.

Now just consider this, who are the so called 'significant' people in a typical person's life. It is probably the spouse, kids, parents and the boss at work. Just by probability alone it will be highly likely that in any given year a person will have one or more of his 'significant people'  facing a rough year. If a person is easily affected by the troubles of those close to him, there will be no peace in his life. So how does one shield oneself from say the foul mood or negative energy of say the boss or spouse etc.?

Setting boundaries is essential though it can be quite difficult and has to be learned. Boundaries remind others of what they can reasonably expect from oneself.  However fear, guilt and doubt may hold one back from being direct in expressing one's tolerant limits. Some people may even feel there  shouldn't be any limits for close family members. However honouring one's own needs is a kind of self respect without which one wouldn't be able to support others in an effective manner. So self care is essential and one needs to be assertive if need be to exercise that.

By the way if I have mastered Buddhist concepts well I shouldn't be checking on horoscopes. The point is difficulties, challenges, the ups and downs in life is clearly spelt out as a truth in life. So why look up the horoscope? Even if one is spared this year one may not be spared the next, haha. As most afflictions arise from clingings and attachment learning useful skills to overcome will be the most helpful way to face the Grand Duke of Jupiter when he chooses to visit.

May we all learn to be more Equanimous in the year of the Horse!