The 99 Mark Scourge

My thoughts today are reflections after hearing a podcast whereby a psychiatrist related a comment from his client. The youth (client) had shared that he felt so much worse attaining 99 marks than when scoring marks much lower. This was because he kept on ruminating over what he could have done to achieve the perfect 100. His list of "shoulds" was long. Do be wary of your children developing what I shall term "the 99 mark scourge".

A child who does very well within the narrow confines of scoring As or winning medals and being rewarded by approval from authority figures like teachers and parents as well as peers, may be quite lost once they leave school and college. The quandary sets in when they are faced with the multi facets of life and when it dawns on them that they can't be perfect in everything. Heaven forbids but the ingrained perfectionist attitude may hang around them like a plague, a scourge. They may want to achieve everything, want to max out their existence to win approval perhaps now not from real authority figures but more from their own internalised authority figure (their ego). If they are bosses they may become very frustrated with the seemingly lackadaisical traits of their collegues. Always tense, they may also become easily irritated and dissatisfied with obstacles that slow them down in achieving more. Instead of enjoying people, warts, nuisances and incompetencies inclusive, they may feel being hampered all the time. For those who are more self aware they know they can not be parents for they can never be "perfect" both at parenting and achieving excellence for themselves. Now you see why we have the problem of not being replaced.

So be wary of encouraging the one track pursuit of achieving 99 marks because the consequences of the scourge can be a long lasting pest that feeds on happiness.