Meaningless Denial

Much that I admire our government for all the great things it has done what irate me is its readiness to jump in defence even at the slightest remark or suggestion by any netizen. One guy wrote in the paper's forum page alluding to the fact that the "Growing pie does not mean bigger slices for all" and that middle class income has stagnated while the real wages of the lower income had declined. True to its known efficiency the MOM replied with statistics that showed that real incomes in the bottom 20 per cent grew by 3.1% p.a. over the last 10 years (on a per household member basis) and in fact it grew a little faster than the top 20% (2.5% p.a).

Hello 2.5% on say $200k is $5,000 p.a while 3.1% on say $20k is $620 p.a not mentioning the compounding effect if such excesses of the top 20 earners is saved and invested. I am also quite wary of how the govie juggles statistics to prove a point. Having personally experienced how statistics was massaged for various purposes (eg. duration and top/bottom percentiles), I question the basis of "per household member " and the 20 % instead of top 10% etc.

Truly the writer to the forum is concerned about the the inequality in our society and how it affects social mobility of the lower income families. That is the essence of his message but MOM chooses the narrow approach defending with statistics on income. Don't we all know that wealth is in the asset classes and also in passive income like capital gain and dividends which is not even required to be declared in income tax assessment as it is exempt from taxes.

Ell Broad who started 2 Fortune 500 companies and who turned to full time philanthropy opined that "no amount of philanthropic commitment will compensate the deep inequities" in the US short of some forms of wealth tax like capital gain tax , higher income tax and inheritance tax. He opined that policies like raising the minimum wages, reforming the education system , building affordable housing and expanding healthcare will not addressed this crisis adequately.

I think it's time our government wrestles this issue carefully instead of being jumpy and kicking the can down the road. Its a grave problem and netizens know it and are content with an assurance it is being weighed on instead of some simplistic meaningless denial.

Moments of feeling important

While looking for a document I stumbled across a journal I wrote way back in 2003 detailing the daily events during a road show in the US to sell my company's bond. It was the company's debut international bond road show involving the Chairman, CEO , Executive Director , CFO, several others and me. Although I do not belong to the top management, my role was crucial as a worker bee crunching the numbers for them to agree on the pricing and liaising with all participating banks in US, Singapore and HK to carry out the FX swaps (hedging the foreign currency exposure).

As I read, I recalled the sense of pride when I described how I was the "nucleus" of the pricing operation remarking "everyone was running for me" and being seated between the chairman and the ED. I can still remember how important I felt when the Head of Sales Syndicate at Morgan Stanley New York invited the CFO and Treasurer to the trading floor to fix the prize which was followed by cameras clicking and champagne popping.

16 years later it really surprises me that I still look upon those moments fondly and with pride when my memory was refreshed. My Buddhist studies seem to have been lost on me when I discover I still relish moments in my life when I felt important. Looks like I am still attached to being 'somebody'.

However the fact that I have actually forgotten about them until I read the journal is a good sign. It shows that I do not hold these so called personal moments of glory too dearly. I am known to have a very short memory though. I do not recall much the details of events that happen during my first career in finance. On the contrary I remember quite vividly certain encounters and experiences I had with the children I counselled and engaged with during my second career. It just means that experiences that touch my heart stay in my mind longer or forever, at least more than any pompous moment of recognition by others (which no one even remembers except myself).

Happiness Act

With credits offered for joining WINGs as a member, I am now attending a course "Happiness Act". Very often in attending such courses, it is not so much what is offered in the syllabus but the sharing among participants and remarks made by the trainer and participants that give glimpses of various challenges in life and ways to meet them.

Yesterday's topic included Healthy Relationship and Authentic Communication and needless to say there was quite a lively discussion about husband/wife relationship. One particular remark by the trainer struck me. She said it is quite common for elderly couples to have little conversation with each other, especially after the children become independent and have  left home. With increased life expectancy however we have to seriously think about how to live another 2 or more decades with our spouse. Do we want for the rest of our lives to live in a cold war environment or for that matter plug along in boring coexistence?

She suggested that we have to make a serious effort to 'create a new relationship'. I never saw it that we have to 'create' a new life together. At the back of my mind, it has always been resigning to 'incorrigible' behaviour and accepting (with lament) different interests for the rest of our lives to avoid further frustration. It never occurred to me that something more proactive should be done.

So for a start I googled about creating common interests among couples and found this website suggesting "80 Fun Hobbies for Couples to Strengthen Relationships"- 21 outdoor, 16 indoor, 15 to do at night and 28 to do at weekends.

Well out of these 80, swimming, travelling, watching movie (in our case historical tv drama), eating out at same old places are about the only hobbies we do together. I guess from this list of 80 there will be a couple he will be game for after persistent requests like having a picnic, going to the theatre and kayaking. On my part I must brave the sun to agree to cycling and hiking. In addition instead of nagging about him turning our garden into a jungle, we can collaborate our individual gardening effort or embark on DIY projects, maybe with me drawing the description and he building and implementing. To avoid argument and blame we may have to compromise or make an agreement that once a month at least each has to abide by the other's request.

Hopefully he will appreciate my initiative. Like my trainer says if we don't start now we will dwell in a lose-lose situation for the rest of our lives. It's time to grow as a couple before it's too late. It's time to act and that is why the course is entitled "Happiness Act"

Starting off at 80

Attended a creative writing course conducted by SPH which is fully paid for using the Skills Future grant. About half of the class of 16 are retirees the oldest being a lady of 80 years. The rest are working people taking a one day break to try and rediscover their inherent love of writing.

The 80 year old lady looks more like someone in her late sixties . In appearance and behaviour she displays no traits commonly associated with the very elderly. Unlike some older senior citizens who are very forthcoming with comments (often irrelevant), or demand special attention and respect or exhibit negative attitude she carries herself sprightly in body and mind.

Never did she ever remark about being too old to try anything new except when the lecturer shared about a  3 year Master program in creative writing offered by LaSalle College of Arts. She wondered whether it is offered in modular format jesting that she may possibly expire before completing the whole program. At lunch break she told us it is more likely she will take up Chinese class instead. Being a Peranakan who does not speak Chinese she has difficulty ordering food at Food Courts where the stalls are run by Chinese Nationals and often receives sarcastic remarks about being a Chinese not knowing her own language. Clearly she is one of those people who inspires others to keep on learning and venturing into new fields irrespective of age.

Well, at the start of the class when asked to share our intention of attending, I sheepishly said I dreamed of writing a Children book. Among the many take aways from the class, setting  aside time to write strikes me as the essential first step.  It is no use telling ourselves that we don't have the talent and that we lack ideas, knowledge and writing skills. All we should be doing is just write freely about anything at all for say 15 minutes a day.

The idea really is to take the first step even if it is a baby step at 80.