Children's inexplicable imagination

I am rather perplexed at how children sometimes perceive things. 2 cases make me realise how impressionable a child can be and how their imagination or fears can cause them to spin wild stories around themselves.

Both cases involve the death of another child in their life. One boy related to me an event when he is responsible for the death of his "sister" who choked on marbles. He said those marbles were his and he failed to keep them away from her. When I checked with his mother to ensure the boy is not having Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, his mum was aghast. The baby girl was his cousin and she passed away before he was even born. She did however choke on marbles.

Another boy 11 years of age related to me very vividly how his sister broke free from his mother's grasp, ran across the road and was knocked down by a van well before his very eyes. He said even now when the wind blows, he can feel his sister near him consoling him. I was stumped when his mum informed me that the only child she lost was when she went for an abortion some 5 years back after she divorced her husband. It was a female foetus and she did tell her son about it.

In the first case, I can imagine the child's overblown fears when adults warned of the danger of putting marbles in one's mouth. They must also have mentioned the incident of his cousin's death frequently.

I can think of one possible explanation for the second boy's imagination. The child could be marrying the notion of death first heard from his mother with that of a visual encounter with death probably on TV. As the boy currently has a tumultous relationship with his mother he longs for comfort from a loved one. Thus he romantisizes (possibly picked up from TV too) the presence of his sister in the wind.

It is known that children can become obsessed with a single glimpse of an image which can instil fear or fascination for months. The absence of an emotionally stable environment can accentuate such feelings. It is also common for children to feel guilty and responsible for things that occur, like parents' divorce and even the loss of a loved one. They may feel that these things happen because they have been naughty.

I just think we really need to be respectful with children's feelings and their sensitivity.