Mirthless Laughter

Most of the kids on my list for play therapy were out either on home leave or an outing with the staff at the children's home during the school holidays last week. The boy and girl left watching TV were delighted to be called to the therapy room. It is particularly difficult for children in the home during festive or public holidays when other children are on home leave spending time with parents or guardians.

Perhaps feeling abandoned the boy surprisingly spent a lot of time with the toy baby, taking considerable time wrapping it with the blanket carefully and laying it to sleep comfortably among the big cushions. He then went on to play cooking porridge for the baby.

The 12 year old girl whom I have engaged for more than 5 years now, chose to play a therapy card game with me. By then, the boy had finished 'cooking' and had sit the 'baby' on a plastic chair. As he turned around to fetch the 'porridge' the 'baby' fell off the chair and we all played at pacifying it. The cooing sound made by the boy made us all laugh. However the girl kept on laughing non stop even though the boy had turned his attention elsewhere.

The girl's laughing fit was prolonged and she was writhing on the bean bag. We told her that it wasn't funny but she would not stop. That was not the first time I have encountered her laughing spell. She had on 2 occasions did likewise and once becoming almost hysterical, kicking and throwing things till I had to threaten leaving her alone in the room. Intuitively I had sensed that her original tickled laughter had begun to ring hollow and void of mirth, peels of circumstantial defeat. She had also intentionally prolonged her laughter. I could feel that it was an attempt to release whatever pent up emotions welling inside her, probably despair. This after all is the same girl whom when on one occasion I had advised her to be more understanding towards the 'fierce' staff at the home had retorted "How about me, does any one understand how I feel, I have been here for more than 5 years".

I knew I should respond to her laughing fits by comforting her, probably putting my arms round her shoulder instead of telling her to control herself. However what really puzzles me is my own reflex reaction. I notice I became quite anxious and wanting to walk away. Years ago when I was attending the counselling course, one of the teachers had made a remark about how occasionally I had let out some hollow laughter. In retrospect I do laugh a hollow laugh when I feel nervous or when I face a wall in situations beyond my control or at least I do that when I talk to my cat when feeling sad. Could the girl's mirthless laughter trigger recall of some hidden unpleasantness in my own circumstances?

I need to be more mindful of my own feelings and recognise any triggers during therapy sessions.

"Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on'"
Stand up comedian Bob Newhart