Expectations

An article in today's Mind and Body mentioned a couple when asked the secret of their 35 years happy marriage  replied "Low expectation". Indeed lowering one's expectation in life seems to be the formula for a happier state of mind.

Now some surveys have shown that Singaporeans are quite an unhappy and dissatisfied lot despite all the basics like housing and medical care being well provided relative to any other country. It strikes me that the cause may lie in the very essence of its success and written in our national pledge "so as to achieve happiness, prosperity and progress for our nation". It has been ingrained in us the dire need to be competitive, to be better than most and to be almost flawless to survive given our lack of resources in the global arena. It's not a bad thing, this mentality, for it has catapulted us to a living standard beyond the previous generation's imagination and to an almost flawless state run organisation. However there may also be some unwholesome psychological and social by-products. We expect high standards of everything almost to a point of frenzy, we are fearful of not being better than others, and most important we are puzzled why happiness is missing in the same platter that served prosperity and progress. In short we can not take shortcomings in our stride including the very fact that life is never perfect. In addition the Millennial generation was  also brought up to believe they can always achieve anything that they set their mind on and very often that's almost everything. In itself aiming high is not bad but when carried too far without doses of reality it is dangerously unhealthy.

Nevertheless as we mellow with age we will learn through the hard way to live and let live, especially with things beyond our control. I also believe that Gen Y will acquire great wisdom along the way (albeit the painful way) and eventually develop a healthy wholesome outlook surpassing that of their parents, and in the process realising that some of their wild ambitions are delusional.

As the following quote will remind us:
 "Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect, it means you have decided to look beyond imperfections",
we will sing along with the Beatles : 'Whisper words of wisdom, Let it be'