Valuing and Accepting

Paid a visit to the Red Cross Home for the Disabled at Redhill with my Buddhist teacher and classmates. Most of the inmates are afflicted with severe mental and physical diabilities. Many have constricted and stunted figures as well as severe mental incapacity such that one can never tell how they perceive the presence of visitors calling out their names or clasping their hands.

One feels awkward when greetings are met with the same stare into space or incomprehensible blabberings. One walks down the aisle lined with 2 rows of beds feeling rather scared, uncomfortable and lost. Indeed that is the feeling of being alienated. Then I came across a teenage boy holding a big soft toy dog. I went to his bedside, took the soft toy and did the only thing I am good at, ie. imitating the voice of a doggy, called out his name and touched his nose with the dog's nose. The boy broke out into a big smile and hugged the dog closely. I felt a connection through the dog which put me at more ease thereon.

At the class discussion after the visit, there was of course much talk about valuing our life, appreciating our functioning faculties and about acceptance (on the part of the parents accepting that they have to help their children live out their karmic effect). Back home reading Sumiko's column "Scared to be Happy" seems to wrap up the mood of the day. She talked about these days how small things seem to make her happy as compared to an inexhaustible list of aspirations required for happiness when she was in her 20s or 30s. I know what she means when she cites being greeted by her dog in the morining as an example of happiness. Noticing my cat safe and sound asleep beside me often brings a smile to my face. I should also be thankful for the mental capacity to appreciate the cat's presence.

Sumiko also spoke about being wary of feeling too happy just in case the happiness won't last. She is probably referring to impermanence. I guess even when we feel joyful we have to be mindful that such state is not permanent. Being aware and accepting such impermanence prepares us for inevitable changes.