Beyond 'Me'

 

If a man gets whatever he wants and every thing falls in place for him, will he be happy all the time? 

I google 'life is smooth sailing' to see whether anyone shares the feeling or experience of having an easy life. I only found one person who deems his life as smooth sailing amongst multitude postings of 'my life is never smooth sailing' or 'why is my life always a struggle'.

The young man who thinks he is quite blessed with supportive parents, financially secured background, good education and a good job, did also share about how he managed to overcome some challenges growing up as a person with high functioning autistic spectrum. He reckoned that his relatively smooth sailing life may not have trained him for tough challenges ahead. This young man comes across as a very positive and humble individual. Most important, as pointed out in many readers' comments, he is a person who is fully aware of himself and the circumstances around him and should well manage difficulties along the way.

'What's in the way is the way' as per the saying of one wise teacher.

One day I was meditating. Images,  memories, thoughts, plans, feelings jump in and out of my mind in fast succession. I watch them come and go as advised by teachers. In some brief moments I realise I have no control over all these mind flashes. Why? They are the make up of all that my senses and consciousness have encountered and accumulated, including that of the subconscious. I feel that much of me is beyond me. In a brief moment I loosen the grip of the ego Me.

'In the Way' does not only mean obstacles. They are all the stuff that come along the way, much are unexpected while much are also the product of causality.

Awareness will help to provide a clearer perspective of the way.

Time to live by what we are named

 What is a river? It is a name we give to a flow of water. It is in a continuously changing state, not even a fraction of a second the same or stagnant enough to be called an absolute object. In addition a river flows only because it is part of a natural terrain and we view a river in the totality of the water-flow together with its surroundings including the rocks/pebbles, the vegetation, the mist, the living and non living things in it ie. the entire landscape which we notice or not notice. Every tiny element of it is ever changing and yet every time we recall any river we have visited, we think of it as the same river we have last seen. 

A Buddhist teacher used the river as an analogy of 'self'. 

Reflecting on it I now think this may be what Einstein meant when he said:

"A human being is a part of the whole called by us universe, a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest, a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness".

If we adopt a paradigm shift departing from a separate 'self' approach and adopting more of a "being" approach, we may experience ourselves more as a 'flow'.

Mindfulness is one way to train our mind to be present with the flow. Meditation helps. When we focus on something say our breath, we are training our mind to be present. When feelings and thoughts arise we watch them come and go before calling our mind back to the focused point. We recognise our chattering mind, the feelings resulting from thoughts and vice versa. In some rare split-second moments we may understand the 'delusion' that Einstein and Buddha refer to. 

Apart from meditation there are also other ways to experience being in the flow eg. being absorbed in an activity such that you totally forget about yourself and are immersed in 'being'. 

Perhaps we should start living by what we are named, Human Being.

Walking does it

 

Well when you are stuck at home and travelling overseas is still a risk and a great hassle you have to look within your own country. Of course it is worse when you are living in an island state like Singapore with no hinterland; which is the reason why every holiday season will see a mass exodus out of the country. 

The recent weeks, with my husband being newly retired, we discovered a few nature walks which are quite refreshing. I didn't know Singapore still has many forested trails in addition to the coastal broad-walks, river and reservoir parks as well as botanical gardens. In the past I balked at the monotony of our manicured gardens, the blazing heat and the brow beating humidity which discourage one to venture outdoor. Thus walking has never been part of my exercise regime. Instead I attend air-cond fitness classes or swim in the late afternoons. The only outdoor exercise is my weekly Sunday 8-am taichi class when I have to pull myself out of bed so I wouldn't miss too much of it. 

With the suspension of fitness classes and quotas placed on the club's swimming pool I forced myself to walk, with a target of minimum 5000 steps per day. First I discovered much much more about my neighbourhood including small parks, a charming Japanese cemetery niched inside a residential estate, a broad canal/river just half an hour walk from home and quaint houses a few streets away. Of course I am still fussy over the weather choosing only cloudy days or timing walks after the rain.

Then I began to venture further from home taking a bus or train to forested places where I can do my nature walk even when it is sunny and hot. Where once I would never think of walking anywhere further than one bus stop , I now find walking no longer a chore and really quite pleasant especially when you are with nature. I have learnt to breach my 'comfort zone' and discovered lots of interesting places and gained new experiences. When walking alone I find myself more engaged with the world. The endorphins generated makes me comfortable after the walk and both body and soul feel restored.

“Above all, do not lose your desire to walk: every day I walk myself into a state of well-being and walk away from every illness; I have walked myself into my best thoughts and I know of no thought so burdensome that one cannot walk away from it.” -- Soren Kierkegaard (philosopher)